OK. So this past year has got me thinking: Younger guys seem more interested in me than older guys. Don't know why - nothings changed. But hanging out with the younger folk has made me look at them in a different way. They're smarter about certain things than I ever was. What thousands of Rands cost me in therapy to understand one of my co-workers got in 2 minutes. Anyway the question posed was:
Why do you wear what you wear?
The answer was surprising in some senses and logical in others. He wore clothes to portray who he is, and what it wants he will do. The who he is part I get. I will go into what I thought I should wear based only on this idea. The second part though did make me pause. What he will do. What he will do? Well some days he dresses to work (a beanie, loose clothes), other days he dresses to be social (smart casual), and some days he dresses to neither work not be social but to express his mood.
Now my wardrobe is trendy, sophisticated, and perfect. MWahahahahahahaahahahaha. I laugh with you. My wardrobe is that of a 60 year old man. Occasionally I might dip down into the mid 40's. Once I hit the right age by mistake and felt terribly silly. My wardrobe is upon reflection exactly what I want people to see and by seeing assume I am. I want or wanted people to look at me as being knowledge full, totally serious, and totally capable of doing anything that comes out of my mouth.
Run a show. Producer an awards ceremony. Create animation in less time than it takes for a polar bear to fuck a seal. Look at me in my serious clothes and agree to everything I am saying. I am not 30. I am 45... I am old. I have experience. I am capable. And in almost all cases this is exactly what people do. I also wanted people to not look at see a sexual being. But to see someone who might have a little wife at home and occasionally have polite sex on a Sunday after tea at 10. I think I achieved this too. Most people assume I have kids.
But I never dressed to say what I was going to do for the day. Be social or be a worker. Be a boss or be a creative. I did have a flare sometimes. A bright shirt, or something, but also slightly serious too. A hint of personality but nothing too great. At home of course I wear a dressing gown, shawl, and in summer nothing. When friends come over it's whatever I can find and that's clean. There is very little thought. Occasionally I might decide - I want to be aggressive today so I will wear red. Or - I need to be passive. So purple. But its a colour not a style.
Now I know clothes do not make the man. But I also know that clothes tell the story of the man. (Or woman OK.) Working in film I know this very well. Clothes tell us a great deal about someone, and should tell us a great deal about their character too. In a way mine does this - however subconsciously. Lets take a look:
His lifestyle:
Here is a serious person when working, but a totally irreverent slob when at home in his own space. He isn't married. But he isn't well groomed either so perhaps just a sad little lonely person. Hence being serious about work. His hair is short and scruffy but not in a styled way. It's just un-brushed. Again no loving partner to look good for. And no reason (hopeless or just not interested) in finding someone else either.
What does he do:
He is perhaps a doctor or lawyer. Maybe a teacher. Wait - he's wearing unpolished shoes. A teacher then. Or maybe a lecturer.
What is his character:
Serious. Focused more on his subject than his personal image. He's fat so perhaps he's a drinker or an eater. So he doesn't handle stress well. Or boredom as he fills his mind with food or drink or both. He is not exciting. He certainly isn't unique nor independent. He is reserved. Perhaps right wing. Definitely a conformist and not an out the box thinker.
Character in the film:
The lecturer who gives a little guidance to the student, certainly not the lead. Unless it's about a man who is about to loose everything and has to survive or die. An unremarkable human without much of a story. Possibly very knowledgeable about say the history of china imports to Holland in the 1700's, but certainly nothing topical today.
Is this my film? Really?
So what do I want it to say? What do I want people to see when they look at me. Well first I have to define who I am. I need to rewrite my screenplay. That old lecturer needs to get a life. So like all good character development theories go we need some basic keyword descriptors.
Name: Guy Campbell Sclanders. (sounds interesting. it's a mix of French/English Scottish and fuck-knows)
Age: 31 (hmmm difficult. Is he young at heart or old at heart?)
Sex: Male. (orientation: Gay. Ah... stereotypical or not?)
Weight: 122 kg's. (he's fat. Why? Is he lazy? Is he a glutton and if so why?)
Race: White. (dull but ok, we need to accept it.)
Now some background info:
Born in a farming community but raised by British standards. Broken home. Studied film. Hid his sexuality until he was 28. Stayed in Durban by the sea. Had a group of friends and would role-play or computer game network with them. Didn't go out drinking (why? he was afraid of loosing control, and it wasn't expected of him - why? Because upbringing said adults didn't behave like fools. Because father did and acted like a fool according to British standards.). Didn't try drugs (why? same as before) but also because didn't need too.
Grew up loving cold, stern characters because they didn't need to deal with sexuality. Grew up admiring older people who had overcome their sexual requirements and didn't discuss it. Focused on history and imaginary worlds as they were safe and interesting because of their definitive values. Moved to Johannesburg liberated after therapy and coming out. Began exploring sexuality. Discovered the trials and tribulations that go with it. Still exploring.
Social info:
Wide group of friends. All non-scene individuals with alternative interests or geek based interests. Some trendy but generally divergent. All highly intelligent. Some socially adjusted. Others just learning how to. Usually the lead instigator of all actions that the social group did. Decision maker within the group. Makes acquaintances easily by having broad knowledge of many subjects. Close friends take longer but do form fairly quickly as our hero is socially open.
Goals:
To be creative. To make things of value. To contribute to society's understanding of self. To further knowledge. To entertain. To educate. (interesting group of words here. Nothing about social needs). His new goal is to be more social in terms of relationships.
Difficulty:
Relationships require individuals with whom one can have a relationship. Also a relationship requires attraction. Attraction is based on appearance initially. Socially hero can meet people and befriend them. But cannot find long term partner. Its either wardrobe or personal goals / attitude preventing this. However given that friendships have been in place for almost 20 years wardrobe seems the immediate answer.
So our hero's film then in about changing his appearance. Finding out who he is becomes the critical factor. So some keywords will help here:
Gay (but not stereotypical) - jewelry of some kind / piercings
Big (socially) - hmmm bright colours. Bold designs
Creative (artistically) - unique designs or signatures
Knowledgeable (experienced) - career related clothing / icons or pictures relating to subject
Young (31 is) - looser fitting clothing, younger iconography in designs
Out of the box/challenging - strong contrasts in colour and texture / piercings or tattoo's
Not mainstream - no designer labels
Serious - a little professional neatness or reserve - jacket or slightly formal finish (a tie perhaps?)
Sexual - playful design / slightly risque approach to imagery
History/Origin - British motif perhaps / red's, blues' and whites, or greens given farming background.
So perhaps a serious look might be greens,blues, and whites, whilst a causal look might be reds and blues. But always loose fitting. Always slightly silly, always bold. Covered with a single serious item.
Will this rewrite our lecturers story? Will it allow him to achieve his goals? Who the fuck knows. One must just watch the film...
What does your wardrobe do for you? And how does it do it?
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